Letter of to Love
I love you
I’m in love with you
I’m in love with being in love
I love being in love with loving you
I’m not in love with love, I’m in love with you
I’m not always in love with you
My love for you makes me hate you, sometimes
I hate not loving you
I fell in love with you, but I didn’t love you
not like I do now
I fall in and out of love with you seventeen eighteen times a day
I never fell in love with you, I crept into love with you
It’s a good thing you caught me
when I fell in love, fell for love, fell for you,
fell on you, that time when the two train jolted stop
Love makes me lose my mind
I lose my self to in love
I lose love in my self
Sometimes I love you, leave you
Sometimes I love to leave you
My love will never leave(s) you
I love you, do you love me? You won’t leave me?
Please do love me, please don’t leave me.
My love will lead me, I can’t lead my love — Can I lead my love?
Before you, I had to read my love,
now you can read my love
everyone can read our love.
Do you read me, really heed me?
Don’t leave me, my love.
Don’t you need me? Am I needy?
I love love. I love you,
my love, it’s you I love.
I love how this poem makes use of such few words to tell a story. I like the contradictions, the rephrasing and the cross out marks as part of the poem--what a cool idea. The line: “love makes me lose my mind” is an abstraction and isn't needed as you don't really play with it like the other abstractions. Overall, smart poem, a far cry from the abstraction poems on day 1 of class.
ReplyDeleteThis poem is presented in a way I would imagine a love poem should be presented- girly red script in a notebook. In that aspect, it's very visually appealing. I also think the repetition of "love" throughout the poem really depicts the speaker's obsession with the concept, which I'm sure is what you were going for. I especially like the cross-out in the title of the poem- "to" instead of "of." Changing this one small word changes the whole direction of the poem. I also think the rhythm of this poem works well. I suggest elaborating on why you specifically chose "eighteen" instead of "seventeen" later on in the poem- what is the significance of the number eighteen in relation to love? If it was just a random number, why not leave it at seventeen? Really brave of you to experiment with abstractions, and actually make them work!
ReplyDelete